For many, the unknown is exciting, each day a tiny adventure wrapped in its own potential. For others, the unknown is scary, a chaotic creature we prefer to keep hidden in a hallway closet or tied up in a suitcase stuffed with rocks, left to sink to the bottom of a small lake or city pond with poor visibility. If you couldn’t tell, the latter best encapsulates my point of view. But no matter how chaotic or unpredictable life gets, there’s one thing I can always count on. She’s warm. She’s comforting. She can be a bit cheesy. She’s my daily eggsadilla, and she is the fucking dairy-free light of my life.

INGREDIENTS: Coconut oil, flour tortillas, eggs, Daiya cheddar and mozzarella cheese, canned refried beans, pre-cooked microwavable brown rice, Cholula.

Step 1: Pop frozen brown rice in microwave. Cook for three minutes.

Step 2: Meanwhile, coat two frying pans with coconut oil. Put burners on medium heat. Try not to catch sleeve on fire. I find if I remind myself of this, usually repeatedly, I’m less likely to catch on fire.

Step 3: Crack two eggs into one of the pans. Mix in about a quarter cup of brown rice. Scramble the shit out of your mixture. Salt and pepper to taste.

Step 4: Scoop out about a quarter of refried beans or as much as your stomach calls for. Fry in same pan as eggs, keeping the two side by side without mixing. If the eggs and beans touch, your eggsadilla will be significantly less delicious.

Step 5: Place flour tortilla in second pan. Heat up on both sides until there’s just a hint of brown. Add a hefty combo of mozzarella and cheddar to the tortilla, spreading evenly over one side. Give the cheese about 30 seconds to melt, then flip over so cheese side is face down. Let the cheese crisp up before flipping back over.

Step 6: Place tortilla on plate. Spread heated beans on side with cheese. Top with eggs and rice combo. Drizzle with Cholula. Stuff down throat. Feel good and celebrate life. It just got better.


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